welcome to my lala land

life.

2010-11-03T22:34:00.002Z

*__* haven't updated, had nothing to say. Homework, got lots of it and i'm doing it now rather than leaving it. I'm so tired I guess, I'm just so confused with life, I want to be me and I feel like i'm not doing that you know. My blog is like, it has bits of me inside and it's like urgh...I'm so confused right now. GRR anyway.

I want to be androgynous.
I don't mind being a girl and I don't mind called one either, it's just I don't want to be like every other girl you see. I want to be different, I want to, I always have wanted to be slightly boyish in my clothes sense but I've actually never done it, I just look scruffy.
I want to be me now, I want to try out new things, I want to change my hair, cut it short not that short though. I want to wear light makeup and I want to wear skinny jeans on with collared shirts and jackets. Maybe I'll even throw a scarf in there, I don't want to wear flats, i'm going to wear boots on or converses. I want to confuse people, that's what I want to do. I want to like a pretty boy, is that bad? I hope not.

started universty classes this week.

2010-09-28T17:03:00.002+01:00

Last week was freshers week, they showed us around and told us stuff that might be relevant thats all. Yesterday classes officially started but teacher didn't bring in his stuff so I we were like 'okay' and then left after like 10 minutes, since friends were browsing facebook. Today intro to PDP learning and we had a talk, we basically just listened. I am currently very tired, I spend ages in town walking around and looking at stuff with friends. I went into most of the shops, me and my friend are saving up to buy makeup for ourselves so we're hardly spending much. I have some money in my bank and also this time around I get my own bank card, so yeah that's great. I'm getting a haircut this friday booked myself for 2:30pm, I have no idea what hairstyle i actually want, I'm just going to walk in and ask for consultation because I don't want my hair to be fucked up just because I thought it'd look good.

I have to spazz about Universty guys, we have so many chinese/taiwanese/korean guys that are so good looking like seriously. Most of them are like medium height, some are tall but that's like only a little. I thought they'd be tall, I expected them to be. They're so good looking that it makes me jealous. Jealous at the fact they have good genes and they look good with what they wear. I wish I looked good wearing the clothes I did. I just look 'bleugh' and plus they all have really nice skin, not being a pervy but they have like clear pale skin most of them and that makes me jealous. The girls are super pretty too, but guess what. I know that most of them are rich it costs quite a bit to come study abroad so yeah~ I wish I meet some really nice asian kids and we can become buddies, that'd be so awesome. I love asian culture and wow I'm just so happy we have Universty that is so diverse.

I want their skin, universty boys look good in anything urgh. They have clear skin most of the asian guys. My skin is just hideous -.-

Paris.

2010-09-15T21:21:00.002+01:00

On the 6th of the August me and my sister and cousin set off to paris. we reached france the same day. It was Friday and we set off really early like at 6am in the morning or something close like that. By 9am we were in Paris~the city was beautiful. I loved every moment I spent in the city, we spent like 3 nights in paris I think. We visted the main attractions~ I went for the effiel tower.Omy gosh, it was bloody really high, but fear not I did go all the way up it. I enjoyed the view so much, though some of the time my legs were feeling really wobbly and such, aha. The french have some rotten cheese, I guess we all do, we tasted the cheese on the 3rd day on accident, nearly all of us felt sick. I mean when you get a cheese sandwhich, you expect normal cheddar, but I guess the french lady didn't understand us or something. But whatev, in france they make savoury pancakes which was weird. Pancakes here are served with sweet fillings and such, but their too, but it was weird eating pancakes with slices of cheese. We visted the chapel, or church, I'm not farmilar with it, and I can't be bothered to get google out. It's the white chapel! that you can see beautiful views from~ it was nice going up there, but wow was it hot! I nearly burnt myself T_T which was pretty awful.

Other than the paris Visit, nothing really happened in the summer holidays. Boring, I had to fast and keep fasting. Thats all. I can't wait for Universty life, I'm scared and excitied ^^ wohoo hello 4 years of my mature life~ 8D

So ...

2010-06-23T18:21:00.002+01:00

I finished college last week. On tuesday I think and hell it feels like it's been a month. The days are slow and there is nothing to do. I have finished every assignment and handed it in and now I'm at home. There is nothing interesting to talk about, I can only fangirl so much, my life is't going to be dependant on celebrity news. Sorry but I'm not going to sit near my laptop all day, if I get the chance I'll go run off somewhere and enjoy a few hours. Currently I'm so bored though, I haven't done anything at all much,perhaps I should do daily practises on photoshop so my skills get better. Seems like a good idea to me anyway, oh well I'm going to go do something now. So see yah blog blog.

bloomin rude people

2010-06-07T20:01:00.002+01:00

Haha so I'm not that educated with the hindi/urdu/ punjabi language but i'm not stupid. Okay so today i set off to college with my friend, we were walking when two asian ladies walked past us. I am pretty sure she said 'Is that a boy ?' she was obviously referring to me, my friend looked like a female and everything and was dressed like one. I wasn't and well my hair was tied back like always and this bloody woman just says that. Seriously, go mind your own damn business. What the hell -.- that just pissed me off, like ehh are you blind? she must have thought I was my friend's brother or something then >_< GRR.
Anyway~ D-NA. Daeguknamah got haircuts and they looks so adorable, Karam looks so much like Jaejoong. He's my age *__* and it's so hard to believe that rofl <_<. He looks way younger than me, but obviously I just think that, because people still think i'm 17 or something .__. I'm 19 , thank you very much. Haha .__.
Oh yeah, what else...ERM o.o I'm nearly finishing college! 8D oh yes baby and I'm in a good mood. D'aww. Yeah and Jaechunsu had a concert, heard they were all emotional.
Junsu single is like hot *__* and so is he, Yoochun stars in his own drama and Jaejoong plays a innocent victim in his japanese drama. WAHH reason I haven't watched the drama, I heard he plays someone sad and emotional, plus he gets bullied in it. I don't want to watch him crying, or getting beating up. I won't be able to take it T_________T Don't touch my man like that wahh T_T. PLease!! GRR so yeah, I'm glad he has a drama, hopefully jaechunsu get out a single this year ~<3 I'll BUY IT.
You too HOMIN! <333>_<; WAH Yunho, doesn't have a huge voice like junsu or jaejoong, but lets hope he's improved and that the musical is a success.
I need changmin! <3 SM better continue showing us HOMIN, if they end up like CSJH. I will go over to korea and strangle the owner of SM. Only kidding, but yeah. Don't hide our stars.

who am I kidding.

2010-05-08T22:29:00.002+01:00

This is me and I will never change~!
I'm a tomboy, I love being it. I love dressing like a girl/guy.
and you know, I give up trying to be girly girl. Because I ever won't be it. I just don't want to, it's my damned choice and I hate the fact that at times I am influenced by the world.
But here I have decided, I will continue dressing my way , I'll just make it a bit more neater and bit more girly rather than trampy like most my friends call it. 8D
I dress trampy, dude I admit that, I don't iron my clothes at times because I'm lazy and yes I don't care if i don't look good enough for people.
But heck it! I want to make that effort now, so that people know I can look neat and still keep my fashion sense. I'll prove to you that I can be just as good looking with my style of clothes~ I don't need dresses!!

First of all I gotta spazz about one particular girl. KIM HANEUL ~! Storyseller's drummer.
she is hot, she is pretty and she is talented like hell. The way she goes dum de dum on those drums, I fell in love at first sight~<3333 storyseller man, you guys are just awesome. I can't wait for their single<33 They've been pretty much inactive since 2008 apparently, though they've had those occasional concerts and such!

so ill

2010-04-24T12:43:00.003+01:00

Been ill since wednesday, it's awful. Gah I need to get better quick, hate the sickness feeling.
My mouth aches like a whole loat and my flu is juat bad. My voice doesn't sound like mine, I am so effed in the head, gah what kind of sickness if this awful. I thought I had swine flu, but I'd probably feel much worse if I had that though, so yeah all is fine I think.
Why the hell do my teeth hurt, I brush them once a day or sometimes twice because I get lazy. They're not yellow or anything, they look normal. Why oh why...ah wait could be the inside of my cheeks. They're the ones hurting so probably the cheeks fault. My nose won't stop running, ew I hate runny noses but I have it. Medicine is the worst, and I'm having to drink it, like life couldn't get any worse.
Oh yeah it actually can, I have shit loads of work to do and apparently I'm too sick to do it, but thankfully most is done. I want to do more work, I like college. I like studying sometimes.
Korean language here I come, <3 aha My summer holidays is going to be off me learning korean, oh yeah baby that is awesome my friend. Anneyong haesyo, cho neun H imnida o.o; that was romanized and I think I missed a word, oh sucks.
Gotta go and well eat or something.

my fandom is techincally over .

2010-04-17T23:07:00.004+01:00

DBSK is probably now no more~ I've known for some days I think.
I'm sad, but yeah it's life. Gotta move on like them I guess, well I'll still support them wherever they go. I'll stand by your side, even if you can't see me, my biases will probably take over, but hey I'll keep stalking you 5 guys if I can~
I'll keep making wallpapers of you 5 guys even if you aren't physically there, I'll just become a pro at manipulation. I'll make my yunjae true, I'll use the skill of photoshop and love and make you guys seem together even if in reality you're not hugging or speaking.
I want to become an artist, so I can draw you five, the five of you together, having fun and talking. I'll never give up, I will not stop loving you all five. You'll forever be my dbsk~ you're never going in my eyes.
I want to be able to draw you guys together~ Hopefully one day I'll even sell comics based on you guys, now that would be fun. Manga's that's what, I'll draw you five.

JaeJoong I love you, please don't disappear~ I love you too much. You're like a warm blanket
Yoochun, please don't stop doing what you do, don't lose your charm. I love you so much~<3
Junsu, continue singing, your voice soothes me~you're my sun.
Yunho~ Dbsk's leader, we love you, I love you. You're a strong man and I hope in the future you become stronger, please don't give up.
Changmin~ Magnae, well you're older than me, but still..don't give up so quick. Keep singing. Stay in front of my eyes where I can see, I don't want to lose you all.

DBSK, I'll keep listening to you~ even when I'm 50 odd, I'll keep listening to you guys, because your music truly inspires me.

My own life hasn't changed much, other than a part of my heart has crumbled a little bit. But it's healing slowly. I hope that in the future I can meet one of them atleast~ <3

They unoffically broke up

2010-04-03T18:21:00.002+01:00

DBSK,TVXQ TFXVQ, has somehow come to an end.
I fell in love with them in 2007 and in 2010 I got my heart broken by them.
;____; I am completely devasted and in a mess because of this news. I love them dearly so much and they have currently paused their activites. Everybody knows what this means~
it's awful but it's life. All 5 of them have split somehow, HOMIN and JAECHUNSU are on completely different sides now.
I hate you SM so much, but you're a company and not a person, so I can't waste my time cursing you.
JaeJoong. <3 I'll follow you wherever you go, just please stay in the spotlight so I can see you clearly.
All of you please stay in the spotlight, please continue your careers are singers, actors, or whatever path you choose. I want to see you shining. I don't want you to get out of spotlight, I'm being selfish I know I am, but I can't help myself.
I love you all. <333

wow I'm a bit mean

2010-02-11T20:34:00.001Z

I forgot to blog *___* Though I knew I should have..right have to start again.
I seriously have to otherwise well when I get amenisa I'll forget everything.
Okay I'm kidding on that part. Anyway. I did my UCAS before the deadline and got a reply back, still waiting for the other replies to come and I hate waiting. Other than that, nothing has changed. I have a theory test on Tuesday apparently and that's about it. See my life sucks really bad, there isn't anything to do, because well there just isn't. Gah oh yeah! I feel ugly that's about it. Hmm yeah I am seriously considering nose surgery, or rhino something when I grow up and also Laser treatment for the facial ugly hair that exists. Seriously I'm a girl not a man, if I was a boy I wouldn't have minded at all, but I'm a flaming girl. I hate life and I'm out. Sorry I got nothing to say really.

ahh

2009-12-26T19:31:00.002Z

LET'S NOW PANIC.

I HAVE NOT DONE MY UCAS. GOOD GREIF.

NOR IS MY PERSONAL STATEMENT GOOD ENOUGH.

LIFE IS A BITCH. STFU

been almost a month since last update

2009-12-14T19:37:00.002Z

Life has been so busy and I've been lazing around. I should do my UCAS like now, but I won't atleast I've done my personal statement. You know what i have a spot near my nose it's red and it makes my nose look huge, I hate it. These day I've been eating less because I forget. My hand are getting, well the skin is thin I can see viens sometimes it's rather disgusting and I don't like having a heartbeat on my hand. I'm scared of the future, it's really a scary place I wonder where i'll be next year and in what place and doing what.

My nails are growing and I'm letting my hair grow too because I want to have medium long hair because I've never had long hair that's really long, I wish I could you know. I think i'm growing taller or something, I still hope I am because I want to, growing taller is fun and better for me, since I'm like a midget you know. Christmas is break is coming this week, I am working once again on a SALES day in NEXT. I did it last year on Christmas and this year in Summer. That's what happens when you don't have a proper job.

Nothing happened with TVXQ other than Jaechunsu had a smile charity even fan meeting, they smiled which was good. Changmin and Yunho still look emo. SM FU. I'm starting to like other bands, like I'm interested in MBLAQ<3>

since i

2009-11-19T23:03:00.003Z

i decided to talk about Dbsk, haha because of Yunho, I have wrote why i hate you mostly, I like you kinda because you make Jaejoong smile, you're hilariously funny at times. Remember the noky times and when you were laughing with Yoochun, Gosh you were so funny you know that.
I loved your wonky teeth and watched a few old xman videos and other stuff with your old teeth, you looked so cute you know that. I like the way you were younger, more carefree, now you just look old and well I don't want you to push yourself too hard. Please don't leave my jaejoong alone with chun and su because he loves you. He really really loves you, you're the closest person he can be with you make him smile like so bright, you make him blush and more, please don't. I love Yunjae, and yunjae with yun..is just jae alone. I don't know if the pairing is real or not but I ..in a way want it to be. T____T even if you guys end up marrying to women oneday I want you to be atleast together in some sort of relationsip . I reallly really don't want anything to happen to you too. Now im rambling on sorry.

Without JaeJoong, a part of my life would crumble away. He's my inspiration, my rolemodel, my dream guy my such more. He's everything nearly, I can't find faults about you, I just can't seem to, you're almost perfect but I would never ever in my life try to even be with you, because kim JaeJoong is way over my standards. He's like the sun, and I'm like a small daisy, stuck between many. I want to keep lookin at him from afar. I think I'd be too shocked if I ever met him by chance, i'd probably faint and die D: Kim jaejoong you make me swoon ~ you make me smile, you make me blush, you make me giddy and you make my day brighter, you lighten up my world with your bright smile and your unsual self. I love your dorkiness and your clumsyness, as a fact I would like to say, Kim jaejoong when I first saw you I didn't find you interesting nor goodlooking or cute. I looked away from your picture and stared at junsu who for me, was my first ever Dongbangshinki crush. Do i regret that..NOOOO. never. Kim jaejoong I want you to be as happy as you can ever be, I don't care how you achieve that happiness as long as that bright smile on your face comes back. I don't care who you marry, how you marry or who or what or whatever shit. I want to be looking at Kim jaejoong in the future and be like yeah. I'm a fan and I love him for being jaejoong. Kim jaejoong T___T Han Jaejun sarangahaeyo.

Yoochun!!! what's with your clothes, fashion sense at times? it looks like mine D: which it isn't supposed to be , because i'm a normie who's not a celeb and is lazy. you're famous, you're always looked at, don't look like you walked out of bed, people talk you know , though I find it charming because you're not afraid of people and what they think. I like that about you. I love your voice.

OMY RANDOM OUTBURST. KIM DAUL DIED. T___T
she was fucking amazing, so artistic so out there you know, I loved how showy and confident she was in herself. ;_______;

......editing l8r. sad now

ewww you got that

2009-11-19T22:25:00.002Z

I feel dirty man!!!! like my face feels unclean and i feel fat. Mind you i'm not even 100lbs and above 5ft, Its the legs I blame, fucking flaming fat thighs yuck D: make me feel so humongous and oh yeah Kate moss is getting battered by the press, way to go blondey. anways eating lasanagne too many times a month makes me sick, I ate it like 5 minutes ago and i'm so ewwified its just urgh I can't take it. Right....sorry haven't posted, lifes been a bitch you know and ive got work to do. I started my fuckin personal statement, it sounds so lame, like seriously ._____. i sound like a geek/snob. whatever i need it to get in and i also haven't done my UCAS don't i suck ? wahh im so evil, what else, oh yeah my friends are hypocrites, well one of them. Sheesh person, don't say crap and then do it yourself, seriously sometimes I think you're flaming **** not that you dress like that, you just behave like it at times even though you're not doing anything bad that is seeable to the normal people. Seriously, like come wtf man, and oh yeah seriously you man! don't walk like theres something stuck up your ass and seriously don't laugh every time and look behind at her, cos she's laughing at you and seriously she's only playing along. You're so dillusional, i feel so sorry for you, gosh you think you're like 'it' but you're not okay. You piss me off to no end and you know what I hate the fact that you won't do it front of me but like behind my back cos you know how retarded i find you acting like that. You can't blame me you act like one and well not everyone is going to be on your side. haha I already know about the gifts and such, sheesh she's not even that close to you like say what. ....don't imagine things boy just don't cos for reals you're like...nowhere close to her wants. and You lady are you going to regret stuff in your life and you know what im going to say 'you deserved it' you do and you know what please don't chat shit about other girls, cos the same shit is being said about you and you know whats more idiotic. The shit about you, seems more reaslistic and theres a chance it's real i mean we dont know the real you, you're shy in front of us and stuff but who knows you could be hiding stuff.

okay that was a rant , sorry some people just piss me off to no end you know -.- its like...shut up.
anyways. TVXQ!! yah yunho and changmin~ you better attend the MAMA awards too you're tvxq not ....T.V D: that was lame. I don't care if you're not allowed by SM, get your ass on the show when Jaechunse attend, do it somehow, runaway and attend cos if you don't attend, you're going to look like huge bad guys stop being greedy, choose your bandmates over money why don't you? .___. ....I thought I liked you Yunho, like even though I hate...hated..hate most of your outfits, expressions, acting, dancing,singing...I like you in a werid way. I hate the way you sometimes do girly dances that appear so eww looking, you're not really trying to do those girly dances I know you're not, you're trying to pop but sometimes when you try to hard they look so crappy and make me cringe in my seat. Yes I have sometimes covered my eyes or skipped your dance segments because of that, I can't help it.

I don't like you singing much, i like it more when you rap and sound more like yourself rather than someone on crack, you sing good, you're goood really good but sometimes when you try to distinguish yourself from others you just sound werid to me, sorry about that. You can can rap and can sing, but don't force yourself to do it, do it like you would not cos someone tells you. I know when you used to come on dance shows or vareity shows they'd tell you to dance each time, because you're so cool and dance great. I've seen you MV's you can dance awesome. They pressure you, and you being yourself always give your 100% even though it ends up looking cringe worthy to me.

I don't like it when sometimes your dancing you pull silly expressions, you look angry and then sometimes the picture looks so wrong, theres one picture of you with your hand on your hip and your hand slightly bent in a position one would say 'gay pose' seriously im not against gays, it's just that i don't what you call the pose and you know how those gay charactars on TV and movies do the pose , well Yunho has done that, it looked so werid. I don't like your long hair, you looked so girlish to me, ....no wait you didn't. You look scruffy, like as if the hairdresser was too lazy to cut your hair, and since your were so muscly during your time, thankfully you were in japan so the fashion was okay with it, you look awful during that time especially with the hair. I hate it. I don't know why I don't like you as much as JaeJoong, there's so many faults about you i find.

I don't like the fact your name is with changmin on SM side. I can't stand you being apart from DBSK along with changmin, but I know even though if one day somethings happens to you and I probably won't still like you as much as everybody else in the band, I will cry my arse off and cry till my tears have ran out for you because you're totally worth it. You're like a gem in DBSK, i can not like you but i can't bear to see you without your bandmates, alone depressed, gone or whatever bad shit. gosh you're the only celebrity i like/hate. I don't know what it's about you, you're so ugh, i try ignoring you all the time you know that. Like I didn't watch your drama you know that and didn't finish the first episode cos your acting made me cringe it was soo over reacting. I didn't sit around and wait for your progress because I wasn't patient and I probably won't be with you. I don't know . you confuse my brain and if I ever had a wish, I wish that I could look through the eyes of a jung yunho fan, what do they see in you. Other than leadership and all those good things, what do they love about you?

I love the fact that you exist. does that count?

homework

2009-11-09T21:12:00.002Z

I haven't touched it, in class I'll be rushing it I bet, darn it oh well i'm too lazy and my internet sometimes shuts off which is fricken annoying. Oh the drama You're beautiful well the whole of the boy band knows she's a girl now. go nam is a girl, ooh and guess what shinwoo already knew yikes! he likes her and I'm so excitied man 8D lalal.
back to topic, my day has been well you could say and some rumours about DBSK getting a fair contract is coming out, NOOO i don't want that to happen. You haven't read the contract it's awful man >_>; they're like slaves to SM you know so I want them to leave SM and start new. Now if I win the lottery I will pay for thier fine and other stuff but sadly I'm not rich which sucks so badly man. 2pm is back yeah with 6 members and not 7 sniff sniff.
I'm out now, I burnt the roof of my mouth because of flaming hot lasagne it sucks you know

you're beautiful

2009-11-07T13:54:00.002Z

I love the drama it's so hilarious , I don't get why they get low ratings for. Iris looks shit to me and there is no cute love story going on, people only watch cos of TOP.Duhh well people need to start watching you're beautiful too you know and also heaven's postman is coming out soon. Yay! I love hanhyojoo and JaeJoong's coupling, i saw the teaser and guess what JaeJoong actually knows how to act better than Yunho. Oh baby yes!! ooh i hope ratings be very high and Jaejoong stars in dramas from then on, cos i'd watch him everyday if i could. Oh yes I download 2pm waiting and crazy,the two news songs which i love so much. They are awesome.

Sigh, Today I have one piece of work to do I think or two, which i won't do and will do in college probably. I'll do nothing today just because I can and I will.

I hope to learn korean so i can understand wtf is going on jaejoong's world ;_____; jaejoongiee! wait for meh

crying.

2009-11-03T18:45:00.004Z

I feel like crying, firstly 2pm's song comes on and it's about waiting and I think it's directed to Jaybum. Heck we all think it is. It's sad and sweet, sickingly sweet. Then there's dbsk's issue which is hurting me now. I've never cried for a band, haha seems ridiculous, but I think tonight I'm going to have a good cry about then. I love them, dammit I love them so fucking much. Now there's news about fake interview with Jaechunsu which they denied later on and said they didn't take any part in it. I don't know what to believe and then an offical statement by Cassopeia comes out. They won't believe anything if it doesn't come out homin's mouth. and you know what. I'm going to stop looking at Soompi and Allkpop for thier news. I want to stop finding so much negative news, because it's making me depressed and all day today my mood was slightly down. -sigh- AHHH
i will try to be happy whatever happens, but I don't want my dbsk to be split. ;____; why why ahhh why so bitchy for sm. I hate you SM, I hate you for making us love your bands and then watch as you tear them apart in front of us. I'm so frustrated, I don't know what to say and how to react. well JaeJoong's kissing scene picture was revealed. He kissed open mouthed, it actually made me laugh that he can kiss a girl. But wooo~ it was with han hyo joo YAY i love her, not like that though. ^_____^ that made me happy for a moment and then I saw Yunho's kiss pic and went gross, I was looking at his hands , he seriously needs to use vaseline on his hands. Yeah..and the only reason I went hunting for Yunho's is cos some fan decided to make a yunjae version which got me like WTH . like seriously did you have too...-.- gosh. I'm a Yunjae fan but no I did not wanting to see that. GRR anyway then I got sad since I realized that kiss with JaeJoong was old and Hanhyojoo kissed Lee seungi. >_>; and there's no chance those two will go out sniffs. BTW why does ARA look fricken scared for and shocked, anyway to me Yunho's kiss was the last best thing they could give to the fans~ since the drama got cut off and i'm pretty sure the fans are going to be glaring at him and her rather than smiling. Well ...still eww, Maybe I'm just immature, I don't like watching people kiss and Yunho's kiss made me go eww, two grown ups kissing yucck. Though ARA is young, a year older than me ...ewww D: I was a strong, I wanted Yunho and JaeJoong to be together forever, I don't know what happened to me or them. I want this court shit to hurry and end and I want jaesuchun to win because they deserve to win against those fucking sm.
I'm waiting for them to come back smiling, come back as Dbsk, tvxq and smile and tell everybody it'll be alright. <333333

disbandment?

2009-11-02T21:50:00.002Z

I surely hope not.
I want DBSK to stay together but I don't know what to believe now, as a fan of dbsk i'm so sad right now i could cry. It's not fair, why oh why does have to happen. SM stop being so greedy, you've always been greedy we know, it happened with shinwha. h.o.t and now dbsk. it's happening again and again why don't they get it. AHHH i'm so frustrated right now. I surely hope that the Yunho and Changmin siding with SM is not true. I won't believe it, why would Yunho say 'we will stay together' and then turn around and go against his brothers. Why would he say that to us for, why lie to us in front of our faces, we believed you guys don't smack that back into our face. But I'm saying now i will side with Jaechunsu, even if SM makes them look evil and that shit. I hate you so much SM so much. YUNHO AND CHANGMIN!!! I don't know what to say to them other than, i feel sorry for them. I was so angry at first but now i've gone weak and instead I just feel sorry for them and sad. I can't hate any of them at all, but I can hate SM. This is the first band I've gotten close with and i've actaully loved and listened to all of thier songs. It's so saddening, of course I knew they weren't going to be there forever, cos I know they have a life but I didn't expect them to get into court fight and money issues. I thought SM was a nice company two years ago when I was new to DBSK, but now I know how evil they are.

my keyboard kkkkkk is taking the piss to work man. GRRR this makes me angry now. urgh.
my day sucked as you can tell.

holidays with no laptop

2009-10-28T14:09:00.002Z

My laptop was sadly taken away, you see on Friday my cousin from derbyshire came over to take my boy cousins over to derby for the weekend and sadly I was going to be subsititue and had to stay over for Friday. I did enjoy staying over, but my laptop didn't. I shouldn't have taken it with me but I really wanted to check up my email and stuff so I did, the internet connection f***** my wireless and then when I took it home the next day, my internet connection didn't work. So I had to PC world and then phone techguys~ I phoned them, they sorted my internet connection via the phone but I had to get my laptop buttons sorted out. You know the left hand click and right button they don't work, so the guy in pc worlds suggested I get them sorted out, I was like GAH after i found out my internet connection works because I don't even use the buttons because instead I use a mouse. So now I'm on the flaming computer and I don't like the brightness of it because I can't even see the pictures without thinking 'hell it is bright' D: cos they are bright on this computer. Other than that, I enjoyed staying over my cousins for a day, it was fun and I haven't stayed in ages at thier house. I used to stay over all the time. My mom stayed over sat and sun. Lol we didn't miss her, cos she only went at night times .__. so we were like 'didn't even notice' hahaha

So far my holidays have been boring, I haven't done anything. I went town yesterday and bought my sister her bday present. Which is the 2nd book in the TWILIGHT series. Haha she likes the book and movie~ she's now a fan, sadly I'm not, but i'm curious to read the book, because the books are always better than movie and we all know that. HMMF I hope that the tech guy doesn't wipe out my hard drive like last time -.- he doesn't need to >_>; yikes! I just remembered that next week we are filling the UCAS sheet I think, and I haven't even done my perosal plan or whatever they call it. I'm so behind, we're not allowed to be over confident in the peice of writing, I wish we could be cocky as ever, that'd be funny writing down ' you know you're going to pick me, I can feel it. How can you saw no to my skills' rofl nobody would accept me if I wrote that so instead I shall write in a mature sense hoping they see my cool personality somewhere in between those huge hideous words. oooh~I bought a toffee cake for my sister on her birthday, it's small but hopefully tastes good.

It sucks , that I buy birthday presents for people in my family and I get one present -.- sad i really am. I shouldn't be so nice. This year I expect more than one persent because I just doo, hmm right I'm going to goo off and laugh cos I can.

YIKES! I wasted all my memory on my usb drives -.- too many pictures stored in it. GAH >_>;

not loking at the computer

2009-10-14T22:02:00.001+01:00

okay so sorry i didn't updare my previous blog im just going to leave it cos I'm too lazy and anyway, my healthy plan isn't working so well. But I have quit my chocolate not so much on crisps, I can't seem to stop because it's like my lunch at school and if I don't eat it I'll have to go get chips which is oily food and I really don't want oul in my blood bu then again saturated fat is just as worse as oil bieng in my body right? Grr I hate it. Next week I have a break, well one week break, not next week like week just starting on friday for the week after that which is going to be great cos then I get to sleep in. Haha I enjoy sleeping in and nobody waking me up, lol sounds lame but it is true.

I decided that chocolate once a week is more sensible than everyday and crisps once a week too because I don't want to cut them completely off right? cos I'm a human after all and I do give in to the temptations. Yeah I'll be more sensible with what I eat and try to balance it out. I like my face getting stamed, it feels so nice and looks much better afterwards which is so cool. Hmm my eyes kinda hurt cos yeah I'm writing this without looking at my keyboard, yes i willhave some spelling mistakes and such but I can't bear to look at the screen cos it hurts and then i have to blink and shut my eyes for a second. Oh one more thing I plan to finish of my moisturiser that I am using at themoment because it's okay but I prefer my old one and haven't bought the old one because I haven't finished this one yet. I'm going to straight my hair right now I think it's so curly haha.

video my hands?

2009-10-11T17:59:00.003+01:00

I have two assignment remaining. Webdesign and Animation, both of these subjects look like a pile of fun but in reality there pretty hard and my animation teacher is so so so difficult. He wants me to video my flipbook animation, now my video camera, I don't even have one. I have a digital camera though and well it's got video in it but it eats all my memory. My precious lovely memory that I need when I take random pictures of things I don't even care about. You see, sometimes I just love clicking the button and then sometimes I just want to seem photographic. I love photography, but I use digital camera and my pictures don't come out good. You need a photography camera to take high quality beautiful pictures. My mother says that she has one, but she isn't giving it me not until I reach universty. Now don't ask me why, it's her problem not mine. I could buy one, but i'm not that rich and I'm saving up for other stuff.

I keep telling myself that I'm going to go healthy, but the problem is that I never can. I just ate twirl minis and a quaver packet and last night I ate chocolate again and cheesecake. I dance sometimes and I try to stretch everyday but I never get the chance too. You see I'm always on the computer, either doing my work or just talking to my friends online. I want to be toned and have a flat stomach and lose the fat arms and thighs but I can't not if I'm like this. So I decided that you know what I'm going to do. I think I'm going to quit cold turkey, right now and just see how long I last. Saying this, I'll update my blog everyday and tell you the food I ate if i remember and what exercises I did and my daily doings. I feel guilty each time I eat unhealthy food, cos i know my body is storing it as fat. I seriously am going to exercise until that fat is gone. I've had enough, I need to start somewhere. Oh yeah, I have no room, so I kind do exercise on my bed which is kind of funny and then sometimes I'll just dance around hoping people downstairs can't hear what I'm doing. One day I'd love to enough space to dance all around the room and also do yoga. I want to try out yoga but I don't have enough room too. It sucks.

Today I ate: 2 eggs . beans and two toast & mulitvitamin with glass of water
2 mini twirls and quaver

that's so far, will be back to edit.

homework omy gah

2009-10-07T21:30:00.002+01:00

I just did my Networking homework and finished it about an hour ago I think. It was alright, since it was p1 it was just simple description explaining you actually know what you're going to be going in depth about later on in your report. I did it and I also just finished off my Database homework for Pat. I think I had two presentations to do and I think I've done them -went to check- yes I have done both of them but got one peice left which is m3 apparently. I have to do Simone's IT with business impact hmwk and Martin's Animation work too. I have so much to do.

Networking done: P1
Database, mostly done P1,M1
Animation, mostly done P1
Website, not done P1
IT and Business: not done. P1

Gosh tommorow I will have to do Pat's last presentation and fit in animation and IT with busi.
I'm stressed but I can't do it now, you know I can but I don't get it, so that's why I can't do it. I need help on it. Life's unfair right now but atleast I got most of it done. Just way behind on Simones, hopefully she'll understand that her work came last compared to the others cos I've only got her on fridays.

I'm off to well stress free my head until tommorow. -.-

new layout

2009-10-03T20:09:00.002+01:00

I just changed my layou to the one shown on my right, isn't it dark and just beautiful. Well I think it is and pink really stands out not that there in much pink anyway. Haha I had to put a picture of JaeJoong on because well, he just looked so hot in that picture that I needed to use it otherwise I'd go nuts. Anyway I'm pleased with my layout, it's by this chick credited as bikiniboy. She has some awesome layouts and is a great inspiration to people like me who are lazy and can't be bothered to make thier own layouts. I want to make layouts now just like her but I don't have enough time. Oh that reminds me that I haven't started my college assignments yet and I seriously need to. I'll put my head down tommorow, for now . Goodbyee bby<3

I went to universty yesterday...i think

2009-10-01T21:00:00.002+01:00

so listen up, I went to my local Universty and it is frikken gorgeous. I love it, it looks so plain and kinda high tech from the outside but as you get inside like the area inside it is like soo cool, they have building with names on them and pretty canals and bench around, there's grass too. It looks a busy park with building surroung it. I like it, and the computing school of the Universty is so like it has been designed to look very modern, like they have some old wood and they have used bricks like the olden types for room but the windows are huge and there is a lot natural light seeping through the window. The computers are good, I saw them, thier like any other school computer but they have programs that are cool, cos I used some programs and I like it. I just love the design aspect and the classes of my Uni weren't terrifying at all. They were like normal classes, the teachers are friendly and everybody is just so lovely. So remember how I wanted to do software development, but I still do, I just want to have the chance of choosing my career later on so I'm going to do computing, which prepares a career for software and other stuff. I'm so blind I didn't look into this course, I simple ignored it bieng ignorant because it just said computing. I'm such a idiot. Well I liked it and the people there are cool. I'm going to ignorant and just say this. If you come to my town, you will see a lot of beautiful people , no kidding seriously I think my town has some pretty good looking men and women, no lie. I went to universty and people are in thier 18-24 or whatever, let me tell you. When you reach your twentys you will be fuckin gorgeous and if you are handsome or pretty now, wait till you reach twenty, all eyes will be on. I think like 60% were worth looking at twice. Now ..that's a big deal there are some pretty ugly people out there. Now when I say pretty ugly, I mean damned lazy, everyone is beautiful you're just being lazy and not showing your beauty. Go on, eat healthy!

anyway! I got a prospectus for Universty of Hull, it's so gorgeous, it's near scarbrough the beach and that is a big deal. and it's doing the same course as my local universty, so in case I don't get into my town, I go there. Though secretly I want to go Hull. >_>; but then again let's hope they have computing with lots of career choices like my local Uni. Then I'll definately want to go and just kick out my local uni. I just want to leave home, I'd be great to you know and have the chance to be independant though I can't cook much or know much finance shit about handling money or other stuff i'll need to know.

choices and choices

2009-09-29T23:15:00.003+01:00

well that microsoft lady did come on monday. You see she came on Monday and it was an enjoyable talk, except for some people who found it rather long and boring, I got a pretty good insight about her job. She's a premier field engineer, no it does not involve cars or anything. Yes, no she doesn't work in the USA. She works in the UK Microsoft company which is in Reading. Yes in Yorkshire I think, which is good for me, because I'm from Yorkshire, so yeah haha yorkshire pride. LOL. Anyway she talked about all the opportunities she had , like she get' to travel so much even though she's travelling around going to seminars and meetings, she gets to meet new people and places. Now come on, who doesn't want a job that means you get to travel around the globe and meet new people, I mean, I'd love to be going to Tokyo one week and then couple of months later to the US for a meeting even, this means that you get the chance to explore whilst you also get some knowledge into your brain. She also said they were lacking females, I'm a female I may be at an advantage then, premier field engineering is pretty new she mentioned that a couple of times which was okay and yeah well I think we heard her the first time. She kept rambling on and I was just wondering how that woman kept on talking, and you know she talked about how her job requires her to go do talk and me being a shy person I really want to start being more talkative in front of class and not having a red face everytime someone notices me. I hate it, but I get red faced when I go up in front of classes and have to do a presentation or a teacher picks on me or someone who I don't know starts talking to me. Me and new people and people are not good, I suck at making new friends, but if i have to, then somehow I do get friend..I just won't remember how I became friend with you. Yeah it sucks to be a friend of mine. Anyway since she's came and started talking, my heads in a little buzz and it's all because she mentioned internship. She mentioned that Microsoft offers those and you know what I love microsoft. I mean, I've used windows and office all my life and well Bill Gates is a great role model. He's a fricken genuis and so is his team, yeah I know he's not the only man haha. Okay so she mentioned something like, err ....Microsoft does with some colleges. Now that some is actually I have no idea, but my local Universty doesn't do it, like only the gaming part of it has that internship and I don't really like gaming. I talked to my Dad about it, he was a bit iffy saying things like.. ' you can't cook, you can't iron' basically he was just listing down all negative points saying how a person like me wouldn't be able to survive alone without my mom. Yeah, if you don't let me loose, how am I supposed to know? suck right. Anyway so I checked up Universtys, lots of them and well like I said I don't really know anything about engineering and..well you know there are a lot of different aspects of Microsoft. So as planned, I plan to stick to my area of choice which is Software development, don't ask me why . I don't know, I love software and developing it seems fun. I like the idea of that. haha. Sooo...what's my problem.
ERMMM I need to know the Uni's that do the Microsoft internship so I can attend them and have a higher chance of getting into the company for my training year. I don't have to get a job there you see, just I want my training done there. You see I'm really paranoid, I really want a good future and me having to go my local college just because it saves money....really isn't a good enough excuse to make me stay other than my friends, but you know, my future life and well I really do want to move away, learn stuff make friends and you know. Well I don't know about you, but I've been looking up.
I've come to conclusion right now, I rather like the Universty of HULL. You see, it's near scarbrough, my brother loves scarbrough, and i'm a sucker for beaches, water and big long island of nothingness and also I've seen the scenery and it's beautiful. Now...all I need to find out, is if that they have that internship offer available in thier uni. If they do, I might just go off there.
Money will probably be a problem, I'll be getting loans I bet and obviously paying them myself so I really don't need my parents worrying about them. I'll have to pay them back and I will you know, so money...yeah I'm not rich but i'm not poor either am I. cos I do live in a house with internet connection.

feeling fluish

2009-09-27T21:40:00.003+01:00

I think tommorow I may have a sore throat and a runny nose. My throat hurts right now, and I have a runny nose which sucks tommorow I go to college for one lesson though which is alright I guess. A employee of Microsoft is coming to our college who is going to talk to us, she's a woman. I want to see and hear what she says. Sounds cool~ maybe I'm just too excitied lol. Anyway I met my friend yesterday, Maryum and Ameena it was fun. They started college Last week and they are worrying about Money. They got loans and it hasn't been deposited into thier bank account yet so they're having to survive on ema they have saved up from the last two years. Yikes! Atleast they get a loan right, I asked my parents If I could get a loan next year just like them and they said no. Which means I probably will need a fucking a part time job, they say they don't want me to get a loan because they want my money to go to me so I don't be like them paying off debt, but still I want to have money and not be in tight spot next year. GRRR I hope they have money because my books will cost and I will obviously be spending. I'm a girl who get's pocket money from my mother still and she holds my credit card. When am I going to get the chance to be independant. ahh! that pisses me off, she should atleast give me my credit card grr. >_>; woman! I need to learn how to handle my money and have chance to be mature financially. Give me the bloody chance. I just hope I get a job, I hate working on tills, I'm not good with customers, I'll go red, I rather be a stock helped or someone sorting out shelves or something. .___. well I'm off noww.

eid and blackpool

2009-09-21T15:52:00.004+01:00

So on thursday we went to blackpool, i took £20 and wasted nearly all off it. Haha the day started off bad, because me and my friend sana reached the place late and the bus was waiting. I can't belivewe were the last one's there. Though I was sure we'd get there early, sucks but we did manage to get on the coach. We sat at the back of the coach where all the students were. Altogether we had about 20 something people only, yeah that's a lot less for a big coach that we had ordered. So I took my mp3 in hope of listening to it on the way but apparently my music earphones wouldn't work. Now i know why they don't work and that is because several times I have slept with them on and trust me i don't lay still when i sleep so the wires must have gotten tangled and each time the ear phones must have gone weaker because on thursday they stopped working for the right ear phone piece and i prefer listening to music with both ears. Listening to music through one ear is just weird , so i couldn't use them and instead me and Sana talked and looked out of the window. The guys were making so much noise, idiots they just couldn't shut up and that was getting me annoyed but near the end they flaming shut up. So we reached there about 10:15am just like our teacher had predicted and then we got rushed over to the education center since we were going to have to listen to a presentation. The presentation, it was alright she just told us about the history of blackpool. Did you know blackpool pleasure beach is actually a family business, well I didn't know that. So after that little presentation we then got our tickets into the theme park. Yeah they checked our bags, I was kinda nervous cos I had like pads in my bag, but luckily the guy never went through it properly because if he did, it'd be embarassing .__.
The first ride the came was the , bumpy cars,I don't know what they call it in blackpool but maryam went on there. Me and Sana didn't, we just watched them and then went to the shop opposite the ride, they sold boring stuff, so we just looked around and then waited for the Maryum to hurry up.
Like i could go on about the whole day, but i'm not planning too. Overall I went on
the helicopter ride, horses,this egyptian boring ride, plus some other which i forgot. But I didn't go on the pepsi max or the avanlache or the irn bru, cos i'm scared of dying. But Sana and Maryum went on Pepsi max and were scared shitless. Oh yeah I tried winning my friend a bear on this balancing ladder, but i failed miserably. We ate food from this takeaway, can you belive they have asian halal food in blackpool, well outside the themepark. We ate from there chips, I had a icecream from a stall before the chips. I didn't really get anything else from the place because seriously I don't like halal asian food .___. much. I ate too much junk. I ate flying saucers, two icecreams and more candy. Eww i felt gross after eating it but then again I was hungry so i had to eat it. Trust me healthy food in themeparks doesn't exist.
Me and Sana and Maryam went to beach, I got my shoes dirty and wet and my jeans too. Haha My friends didn't go onto the sand or to see the water, they stood near the walls and sat down while I walked over to the sand and water and took plenty pictures. <33 I love the beach. weee~
I saw a gay couple, haha they were so cute, they were posing together and like had there arms linked i thought it was pretty cute. My friends saw them but thier reactions were different. Oh well, not everyone's straight you know. haha. Went on the beach twice because, they wanted to see me run towards the middle of the sand right near the edge, only because they found binocoulars and they wanted to test them.
Coming back home, it was quiet and we were so exhausted, since me and Sana and Maryam had been walking around too much. On friday I didn't even want to go to school because my legs were still flaming hurt, but I had to go.

Psshh and yeah yesterday was eid. All I got was like £30 pounds only, but oh well, this just proves I need a real job so this week I'm so writing up my CV and giving it out hopefully this week or next. I ate food lots of it and today my mommy is hosting tonight. Yeah she made lots of food and I'm so hungry right now because I want to go downstairs and nick some food from the kitchen. She made lamb spice curry, meatballs,rice and lamb, carrot pudding whatever they call it, some fried potatoes and even ..chart masala with stuff. Yeah! and I haven't ate since the morning, all i had was samosas that tasted like tuna -.- gross and a fricken biscuit.

I want food and I want it now. grr

Classroom

2009-09-16T18:43:00.002+01:00

Originally uploaded by meme

Well College has started and I decided to well practise my doodling skills in website class. Yeah in college we have a website class it's pretty fun thought I hate the html part we had to write it up. The teacher is easy going, he's a good teacher and I'm glad we have him this year too, cos last year he was my graphics teacher. Im talking about yesterday's lesson btw which was boring. OMY in computer animation class, we always fall asleep, well in the 2nd class in the one where we have to listen to videos, the video man's voice is so boring he puts me to sleep. I just can't help it but to want to fall asleep, he puts me in lala land. On Monday we have an enrichment and in my last college we got to choose our enrichment class,but in this college you don't get no choice. I am doing personal finance, I guess it'll be useful in the future but still I wanted to have a fun lesson not one where I had to remember loans and overdrafts. It sucks that I learned this in Business a year ago and in economics. Damn it, it brings back horrible memories but alas I will pass this class. Tuesday is the longest day and so is Thursday, damn college people switching lessons around. .___. they're going to cry when they reach January and they have piles of works on tuesday and Thursday but no time to do it. Other than that, I go to blackpool again tommorow, this time I will take pictures and save and back them up. Yeah i'm not skipping college, I'm going with my college class. Yeah I am, it'll be fun, oh so fun.

that's my hair, Yes I got it cut. I cut it to my shoulders and got a side fringe. Snap! I don't know what to do with it other than put a clip on it and a hairband. Yikes I suck at hairstyling I just simply do. One more thing, I 've been stalking the aff(x)tion forum loads lately haha. I love my time over there it's so fun and I've been stalking soompi like always I guess. Yeah other than that, I don't think I've got anything else to say. Pshhh oooh TTL-SuperNova and T-ara song rocks, I listened to it yesterday so many times ;____; it's just that good. Yeah and there is this new girl group called HAM. Yeah you heard me right, They're HAM .Heart and Mind. not the meat. ROFL oh well g'day

first day was boring

2009-09-07T20:42:00.003+01:00

hahah we are after all going to be divided into two groups. Thank you for that, I don't want any idiot from the other class to be in our class, because I love my boring group, for bieng lame and boring. It was fun, our introduction lasted about 50 minutes and that's it and then we could go. They gave us handbooks which had stuff that we already know about and guess what! we got no diarys cos he knew we never use it. Haha so that was good and our timetable is fucking horrendous. I don't like it, on monday we have only one lesson and that is enrichment. >_> That's at 1pm, so we only go into college for one lesson and in the afternoon which sucks couldn't he just move it to the morning. Well atleast we don't start at 9am except for Thursday, yeah we got lucky on that. Our lesson on Tuesday is the longest I think, we finish and 5:15pm I think, I'm not going to get up and check that because I'm frickken lazy. >_>; Yeah and I downloaded Yoochun& JaeJoong's melody and harmony ahha I think I'm going to fricken buy it or F(x) album when they bring one out. My new obesession is that girl band called F(x) haha I remember when the teaser was revealed, everybody thought ALEGBRA or MATHS seeing the name and I even wished they changed thier name, but it's okay now. My favorite is the group tomboy Amber, she's fricken adorable along with Krystal and Su-Li the others are good too, but I have favorites so yeah.

school starts tommorow

2009-09-06T21:03:00.002+01:00

OMY GOODIE it's going to be my first day once more, and it's my 2nd year in college. I'm fricken nervous but i know that tommorow is going to be a start of another repetitive pattern just like last year, it's just going to be on repeat. Maybe a lot harder, probably just harder that's all. It doesn't help that I have a few zits on my forehead, which make me look dumb and just more ugly than usual agh. Stupid lazy me, I haven't been looking after myself properly, well beauty wise anyway.
My hair sucks this year too and i'm not looking forward to sharing class people. I don't want new people in my class, i liked my loser class .___. they were funny and boring at the same time. AGH please don't put new people in my class!! Tommorow we go for two hours only I think it's introduction for the 2nd years. Oh well I'm meeting up with Sana tommorow by the libarary i think >_>; -goes to check msgs-

problem

2009-08-27T22:40:00.003+01:00

How do you criticise someone's fashion style without actually offending them. Because I really just wanted to leave a comment, but i didn't because i didn't want to hurt the girl's feelings. It was just her clothes I had a problem with, oh don't worry it was on this site http://www.chictopia.com/.
It was just that, I found her top a little too well let's just say it looked like she was wearing her younger sister's top on and her skirt was too tight. Her hips were looking really big and I'm sure she wasn't aiming to look like someone who just wore her kid's sisters clothes on. As I thought about how to comment her, I realized that I really shouldn't be on that site. Since everybody seemed to be wearing the same style on, the boys were wearing shirts too big or too small and jeans too tight. The girls , some of them were dressed like beggars on a street. Is that fashion? I don't think so. Fashion , well for some of those girls looked like they were getting thier trendy ideas from grandmas and well homeless people. I'm not trying to offend anyone, it's just some people were dressed like that, seriously what is wrong with you people. I don't want to see some guy wearing a huge shirt on with a baseball cap on his head followed by skinny jeans that are too tight and to top it off he wears black sneakers and carrys a man purse. That is so not fashion. Fashion is about class, class is about style and style is about showing off, so seriously if you can't flaunt that outfit, don't even try.

Okay that's all for rant about that.

Other than that, I have been well. Did go to a lot of places this summer, but sadly I had a problem with my laptop and lost all my saved pictures. It's always a good idea to have 2 backups .___. I learnt my lesson. But I went to , Flamingo land, pleasure island, BlackPool, Scarbrough. Had lots of fun. Great fun, but i lost have the details since i went like two weeks ago but I couldn't get on since I had no laptop, it was off to repair. The fuckin tech guys told they'd backup, but my backup turned out to my long lost temporary folder, the shit in there I didn't even want, no wonder it was in the bin and already forgotten. Assholes -.-. Right that's all for today and I'm off to listen to Jewelry, Vol 6.

;___; I hope DBSK don't disband. Thier activities were suspended yesterday by SM. Lee so man, GRRR

Urgh

2009-07-14T17:45:00.002+01:00

Hahaha this summer I planned to go this France and my counsin had planned it. Haha but you know she backed out last minute, I'm guessing she had it planned or something, it's not like she's the only who can set up a trip. She doesn't speak no french, so I don't get it. I can speak english and book myslef and my family if I wanted to. Just because she's been to other places doesn't mean she's the only one who can sort out my holiday. When she first went out of the country, I'm sure did it for the first herself didn't she. Because she certainly doesn't have an Angel doing things for her. Fuck, I'm so pissed I was looking forward to my holidays only because of that. I have been on holdiays, since June and i have no been anywhere other than her house over in DERBY. I'm fuckin pissed all I do is stay at home going on my laptop, we don't even have huge parks here, because my town sucks. The parks here are crowded and frucking druggy kids walk around doing weed and whatever fuck shit they do. God I hate my damned town and I hate this muther fucking drug dealers, I 'm sure there's one living right close to us you know that. man I feel so sorry for his family, damn bastardd drug dealers I hope you all get caught and die in fucking jail. haha I'm so mad at them for making our town look bad and selling drugs to kids. STFU you stupid druggie go fuck someone that all you can do other than hit people and have fights with them. Fuck you I hope you and get hit by a bat. Muahah yeah I'm angry as you can tell, fucking bitches messing up the town. I hate where my highschool used to be, such a fucked up area with fucked up people. Damn I feel sorry for them. retards.

When the educated kids of england grow up, there is going to be poulation of fat lazy parents, who were once. Teenage kids with children, ahah. Why do teenage girls get pregnant, use a damned condom stupid girl. Haha then she ends up fucking her life up, beause she has to take care of her kid and can't go college or Universty because she doesn't have time. Meaning she gets no degreee and no job to support her child in the future. And the guy who fucked her will probably leave her for an educated chick. haha cos she's got money. The man won't care, he won't be looking after the kid, he'll go uni/ college and get himslef a degree and probably a wife with money, a job and a woman with no kids. Cos he probably wants a new family. So there, stupid pregant teenage chicks, seriously sort your life out. I noticed mostly chavs are getting pregnant. That is funny, damn I feel sorry for them and thier parents and the guy who fucked her. Hahahahahah

bored holidays

2009-07-11T16:17:00.002+01:00

seriously dude it's been like so boring i have been doing nothing but be on the laptop nearly for over 10+ yeah and my brain is totally about to fry. -Sighs- I got nothing to do, well guess what i did I joined livejournal roleplay which is like roleplaying a bunch of words kind a like a sotry and it's addicitive and it's pretty fun. That's all i did and I also been looking up Manga artist so I can learn how to draw them. I really want to learn how to draw manga especially this korean artist that has this blog. dear my girl :: 네이버 블로그
I really love her drawings so much that she is my idol for drawing, the pictures are so beautiful I love them.
The weather is pissing me off, it's ugly. Like the sky is grey and ugly blue and it looks like its going to rain and it's supposed to be summer. Where the hell is the sun gone? Come back you dimwit i don'tbad weather stop spoiling my summer stupid weather. I'm going to kill it . Grr
I brought so many books to read. I really like Meg cabots book especially the one about the ex popstar Heather pills. It's so funny to read that I bought all of the books from the libarary and others too read.
I'm going to start reading so I still have a brain when I go back to college in September 7th I think. That reminds me I have to get up on Saturday at 5am to go to work. I have a one day job in Next for Summer sale, which is ridiculous i think. It's going to be so early like 5am WTF. But i didn't write any preffered time but seriously I didn't expect them to be giving it me at 5am hell I'm an 18 year old kid. D: Damn people killing my sleep time. But oh well I so hope I'm done before 12pm because if i'm not i better get paid more than £20.oo for that or else I'm going to sue XDD haha
I got nothing else to write, I'm so bored i have a tissue in my mouth >_>;

muahhaa

2009-06-29T15:16:00.004+01:00

long time no write. haha.
I went to derby on thursday evening stayed till saturday and came back in the evening again.
It was fun, since my counsin actually had no work, so she took us out to thier 'new' town. I haven't ever been to thier town, so i enjoyed it. The place was called Westerfield, apparently is like a shopping mall and damn is it huge. It's so big and like..from the outside it looks like a huge box to me. But from the inside, wow it's awesome.
We went to the cinema called showcase and we watched Hangover. Hangover is rated 15 but should be rated 18 because of all the naked people in the movie, yes it had some scenes that i think were just 'eww'. So two females and males went to watch the movie, my cousin Roheel is such a liar. He forgot that movie was for a male audience mainly, so me and my other cousin sat thier, thinking eww and laughed some. It was a good movie just too dirty. A good comedy, I recommend it to you, but if only you're over 18+. Nad..i really don't know how to spell her name, thought that we weren't suitable to watch the movie cos she's like 33 years old and we were ranging from. 15-18. Haha she said we were kids and all that, I kept purposely reminding her that i'm 18. She just couldn't belive i'm 18. I'm guessing she's still not over the shock yet, she said i looked 15 or 14. Which i think is not fair, because people say I look 16 and some people say I look 18. Hmm maybe it's because she hardly sees her and she still thinks we go to school and are 14 haha.
Well my sister is going to be 16! in october and I can't belive that myslef, damn why do my little brother and sister have to grow can't they just stay 10 or something.
Age is a scary thing to me, I'm going to be turning 19 next year, wow ..I wonder when i will be mature. My parents aren't that mature, and thier 39+ so...i'm guessing i'll still be childlike.
Oh we went on the cinema on Friday, On thursday we just got into the house and were exhausted so much.
Omyyy! I forgot to write. I am a auntie noww apparently.
My cousin who lives in derby had a daughter called safa <- that a nickname, cos I can't spell her name yet and nobody knows the spelling of the name yet. She's so small and red, wow babies always be red when they are born. She's a week old or older. Under two weeks though haha.
Her father , is my cousin who's like 22..I don't know how old he is, but he as a father. Hmm can't imagine it, I wonder how he will be as a dad, he's like a teenager i could say. Oh well atleast he is responsible. He bought us DVD's to watch that were priated and stuff, the quality was very shit, the only movie we watched was maeda goes to jail. Which was an okay movie, but not comedy, it was kinda funny but so not a comedy.
I slept with two blankets and into a deep sleep, I hate deep sleeping because its so annoying, I woke up at like 10 and went downstairs, I didn't have breakfast till one because nobody asked me. So i sat there starving -.- until my auntie asked me and i shook my head. I had tea and bisuits my usual. I really need to start actually eating a proper breakfast before i kill my stomach.
I also went to the big park, I forgot what she called it, but it was big and had swings and all that.
It's near derby universty, so yeah I bet its damn packed on the weekdays especially round 12 and 5 where breaks usually tend to happen.
I loved the swing, it's been ages since I went on swings, so i had fun and we also went on that big red rope thing, I liked going on it, but some kids got on it and started shaking the damn thing. But haha i shaked it when they reached the top, shame on them . Pssh and saturday came home time. Back home now and yesss i am good. It's monday after all and the day is so humid. Yuck I went to town and was sweating so much, grrr hell man i mean ackk why did i have to dress up so badly, jeans and jacket and all that. No wonder..
erk. My face was feeling itchy couple of minutes ago, but its okay noww D:
I bought new product! i'll try too see how they go.

Boom Boom

2009-06-21T14:48:00.003+01:00

Okay so right now I am listening to a song and it is pretty addictive like seriously. I can't stop listening to it, I just want to keep listening it's that good. Well the song is Jewelry (ft. Nassun) - Rally yeah it just came out and I'm listening to it on youtube and it's rocking so far. Goes to favourite it. So recently i created another youtube and I do go on it, because I go on youtube everyday so for me this is good. Haha thank god that google is parterened with people meaning my igoogle won't mess up. Too bad I used a different email for this blog and not the same one for youtube, grr it would have been much easier but oh well i'll live with it.

You know what i can't believe...the weather! it's actually sunny and warm and i don't see rain just yet. I seriously want summery weather, no matter how much i actually hate it. Because it's werid if it rains and is all yucky for summer, because it'll spoil all my mood and then i'll be moaning and groaning and my friends would say. SHUTUP in a loud voice to me, but i'll continue going on haha.

Oh on wednesday I went to universty and it was..alright i guess. My friends went off to help this other girl who also happens to be called Sana to find out stuff about law. I listened for a while but i was getting bored because i'm not a law student and i wasn't really interested at all, so i ditched them and went up to the computing area to find out about Software development and what the course wants and all that Jazz. I was impressed with all the things she said, what annoyed me was that she kept laughing or smiling like as if she was drunk o.o; so i was like..'maybe someone mixed vodka in her tea' she was acting strange and all werid. But oh well after her talk finished me and my friends went to sit down. Rofl at ameena who kept getting sweets and maryum who followed her. Ameena tsk what the hell but i guess she just loves sweets right. sweet addict. WOw and i'm still listening to the that song again and again. Seriously I love it..like i did yesterday with Angel & devil- bad girl.

I smell food >_>; damn the neighbours I am so hungry right now but my mother hasn't cooked. Maybe i'll just go downstairs and go exploring in the fridge. Haha see ya mateyss

My guitar.

2009-06-17T20:00:00.001+01:00

I want to learn to play the guitar using my fingers. It's called finger picking guitar but I'm so terribly confused on how to actually learn it. I got that guitar when I was 15 I think and I still don't know how to play it ;____; yes I am useless at it and I have tried..well not properly. It gets me vexed so I give up the next day but I can't help it, wah I want to make beautiful music too. -sigh- Ohh i decided to also put pictures up on my blog from now on because I want to show me in the future what I actually was up to. Haha right I downloaded some remix korean track, hmm .

The artist is 하이브리파인
the album is Starlight Love [Repackage Album]

It's not my type but I can't help but to listen to it, Haha it's funky in a cool move and it got me moving, well my shoulders but still. What else. Haha I went to town and I bought a nail varnish.

and it was for £1, which is really cheap and I got it from like this market place. So yay me, woot I tried to do manicure but I can't do it apparently so I just did my left hand pinky. It came out really good and cute, haha I like looking at how perfect it came out. Oh and today in college, i totally did like no work at all. Yeah My teacher martin was like.. if you done the work you can go home because tommorow is the last day of college. This was my first year. wooot. I can't believe I made it till the end and I'm getting good grades. I'm really happy.

Soo I never went home straight away cos my friend Sana well she had to finish her work off and I like waited and kinda helped her out.

oh yeah baby~ tadaaaa

2009-06-16T21:29:00.000+01:00

So today I got all my work done, so yeah I'm like free from all the hassle but you never know that fool of my teacher he apparently hasn't marked all the work. Soo..Like I have to wait which is not fair because my friend well her work is marked soo grr I really want to pass get everything in his class. I seriously care about my work and I want to pass everything, I'm so going to put my head down next year because this year we kinda fucked about soo that's why we're kinda suffering. Seriously next year has to be like better. Really better because I'm soo wanting to get into a good universty, I don't want my life o be fucked just cos I didn't pay attention.

ahhh i'll write more tommorow. Kinda blah due too msn repliess that are too fast and my fingers are hurting. Ouchhhhhhhhh!

volvicc

2009-06-09T18:29:00.000+01:00

okay,so here i am again. I'm supposed to be starting on work, but I'm not going to be because I don't want to yet. Eeekers anyway yesterday was fun, some stupid girl started a little blat on livejournal. Damn it was fun, people were hating on her and all that, but she had it coming towards her. I find that extremely fun, haha stupid childish girl. That's one little bitch I hope I never meet, because if I do, I'd slap her across her face. Yeah I'm kinda mad, very mad and she didn't even say anything back to me but still. Forget her...

Nothing happened other than my period started and my right leg was hurting like hell. I hate being a girl sometimes, the pain we get in return is not worth it. I nearly cried because it was my first day on period and hell it was killing meh like hell. Sheesh I wasted money on buying parcetomol and pads -.- yeah and i even had to drink tea in college haha that was so werid to me. I felt like an old teacher the moment i took a sip rofl.

It's cold and i'm shivering right noww ahh. wow well thats it.

hmm it tinks

2009-06-04T21:25:00.000+01:00

EURGH it stinks in my room now, fuck hell now im so mad, I hate the toilet pray it so fucking nasty and gets into my head. AHH My head is gonna hurt now, sheesh can't people keep my bedroom door shut because it's doing my head it. Damn -.- i just wish over this summer my parents move the desktop computer from my room, because it's taking space and everybody keeps coming in and out and it pisses me off bad. My brothers aren't even doing thier work on the computer like they say they are gonna. AGH as you can tell, yeah im pretty pissed right now. I was in a good mood, my brothers spoiled my mood those nuthead i'm going to whack one right now.

GRR

anyway, so i joined another forum today, it's cool and i totally love it, it's my new obession probably haha, i could spend hours on it. I probably will too haha. Yeah it's soo fun to go on it. it's called onetvxq.com/forum i think, hmm i'm not saying my username but it's fun fun to be on there oh yeah. Haha i applied to be a DJ D: but i don't think i'll get the position -pouts- but oh well i don't really mind. oooh and I also decided to update like three times in a week or more if i can. Because blongs are my rants on life, my boring life where nothing exciting happens at all. Heck yeah welcome to my life! I finish on june 18th, did i already write that? but im excitied haha because its 4th june noww and that means 14 days left muhaha oh yes.

Pssh but it also means less time to do all the work in, im going to be busy over the weekend after all doing work, yikes but i might as well get them out of the way because i got summer holidays to chill and just do whatever, without worrying at all which is totally going to be awesome. yeah yeah. Hmm i decided to do something on my height and weight.

Stretch, sqyeeze some cms out XD haha and then eat properly and less fatty foods so i am healthy and look it too. I'm pretty skinny but my diet isn't good, so im changing it over the summer hopefully because i want my baby fat cheeks to disappear, because i just do. Other than that..nothing else i can think of right now. I want too start dancing again hah im so lazy too.

one month D: ahhh

2009-06-01T15:05:00.000+01:00

wow wow wow I can't believe I haven't updated yet. It's now june the 1st of 2009 and I am still here bieng bored and living normal life, nothing exciting has happened at all. I'm finishing college June the 18th and then i will be free free till september. I can't wait till we break up for summer, I'll be chilling around and doing nothing at all like I should be doing and I am doing right now. The weather is nice, it's very warm and sunny just as kind of like it. Though it stinks of fire, damned neighbours putting fricken fire on the backyard. I swear people should first get permission if they want to start a fire, because it stinks right now and i hate the smell so much that I am blocking my nose. I wanted to go outside and just sit down there, but I can't do that since like I don't want to stink of fire. I hear the crackling of the fire and I hate it. Other than fire, today has been alright. I did my assignment for my teacher but I gotta print them out and I am so in the mood for icecream right now haha.

updating less and less

2009-05-01T17:10:00.000+01:00

Ack what is with me, I keep updating less and less it's been time since i have updated. I need to make this frequent and I can't grrr. Damn stupid brain for forgetting. Lala oh well, I found a nice song .
Bad heart by T-max. well that's not the song's real name but they say bad heart in it. So yeah and I don't speak korean or read it. So i translated that from google. TSK google's translator is shit -.-
oh yeah its like bad. Some of the stuff don't even make sense when you translate it so haha.
Google stick to web searches you suck at other stuff and don't even get me started on google chrome.
One bad point about it has that it DOES NOT have a restore button like firefox and it always crashes and then i have to go to end task and close the frozen window that way. You suck chrome -.- I so prefer Firefox over every other browser. Opera and safari are alright but for me FF i love you honey. <3 ROFL
Ladies and gentlemen! I have an announcement that I am bored of life. It stinks and its boring, I can't go out much because i can't drive and my area is dodgy -.- DX I hate you stupid neighbourhood.
I can't wait till i leave this area and maybe the country too. 8D YAY I soo hope that one day i can move far away from this stinking place. I like it but hate it alsoo~ I rather leave it and go go faraway.
This post may be more random cos i'm listening to music while i type and my mind is on the music and soo not here on the blog. wahhh ahhaaha
It's MAY. WOWZAA!!!!! 2009 you are moving fast babyehhh.

morning mister

2009-03-24T21:55:00.000Z

I feel so out of it, like the wind. I feel lost in my wildest dreams
I want to say something, do something , but I don't know anything.
My mind, my heart is empty, I feel like a blank piece of paper and theres nothing I want to write down.
The world confuses me so much, why did i have to be a human.
I want to be a worm, my life would be easy.
-------------------------------------------------
Grrr sorry about that. My birthday was last saturday. I enjoyed it.
My friends got me perfume haha thank god i needed them. I love my friendssss soo much
wahooo~ not fair we don't go to the same college though. I'll miss them when they go Uni before me
oh well, on my bday we went to eat. Pff the place we went to eat was like cckhnhut_ and I was like alright, but it was alright cos the food was good and my friends got me a mini cake. Aww bless them for thinking off that <3>_>; I text quick back just hours late haha. I have a busy life....not really.
When I got home. my parents bought I huge cake for me. It was creamy and Yummy. I sent it Roheel my twin from another mother o.o; haha. I don't think he ate it. I got his card, I feel sad that he is the hospital. He should get well quick. People miss him, especially my little brother. Zeeshan misses Roheel awwww
I got cards and then mom got me me to you stufff which was good. I got a mini teddy bear. and photoclip along with a me to you frame haha. Doesn't seem like a lot because I already bought stuff with my birthday money. I bought clothes, earphones,creams 8D haha.
I bought them a week before~ so yeah. No wonder I had less gifts.
On sunday right after my birthday was mother day. I bought my mom a card. It was big! and cute, I got her a me to you thing. Forgot what it's called. I think it's me to you season 8DD hahaa.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

AHHHH lets rant about graphics long extra work. >_>; Pfff and nobody did task 5
But I want a D* thats a destincation by the way silly. not a D grr. I'm going to do it this weeek
the others don't have to do it. I also need to do Graphics task 2..end part to get M and D. Merit and destincation..erggghh blabbering about work stresses mee out like bad. Pfff and I need to get another blog for personal friends and all. grrr. don't worry can't forget my first love, you blogger. XDD haha

whoopss

2009-02-02T16:26:00.000Z

My bad, I forgot to update my blogger, I haven't been busy just effin lazy and well in a mood. I got a wordpress and I have posted there twice which is good I guess yep it is, but blogger you'll always be my first love. -kisses it- rofl i'm kidding i can't kiss a blog anyway and I don't think i'd wanna anyway. It snowed today like lots, its a whole load of snow. There is a beautiful blanket of snow outside my house well in the whole country I guess which is pretty cool because I don't remember the last time it snowed this much so for me I'm like over the moon but for some people they're under the moon. Traffic was jammed, buses are stopped and people are all home cuddling and sitting in front of the fire place, well not everyone but I was , so ha. I love it so much, I keeep looking outside my window like a happy excitied kid I am, it's so lame but I can't help it.

oooh I want to goo to sleeep now, starting to feel a little sleepy which is not good because it's only 4:31pm haha and i have like the whole day yet to pass. I'll update more often, telling or typing how my day went.

2008-11-26T15:01:00.000Z

Hey hey!
I've been up to some good, yes i have. I discovered pixels and i'm currently very into them. I've been making pixels and blinkies for a week now I think. <- this is one i made. I like the way it has different colours. I had only used 1px stroke on the letter as you can see the the font I used is very small. I used soya_but9 , I downloaded it from a korean font site don't remember what it was called. I wonder how long my hobby will stay for pixels. I've been jumping into Japanese music again and some Korean different genres. Nell<-recently heard their song, wow that's all i got to say. Btw you should try listen to Yui, she rocks <33>.<. I've been trying to make different face smilies because they just look soo cuteee. I think my favorite word in japanese has to be kawaii. I used to study japanese but not anymore since I want to learn Korean because I find that it's easier. Japanese writing is hard -.- I would never even try it. Japanese, writing is hard. Korean speaking is hard . yeah they balance each other out, I want to be able to write and speak, so Korean it is. I can pronounce Japanese better -.- lahhhh. I missed bloggging. I've decided to turn this blog into a graphic blog site. xDD yeahh the pixels and cute drawings illustrations or digital art is getting to my head so yeah. Bleughh wednesdays can be boring, we had no teacher for class some supply came ^_^ yeah I pixeled in class rofl. My mom bought me a cushion to lean on since I type on a laptop on my bed and I don't want no curved back like hunchback. I will stretch every night and day to stop myslef from going into a hunchback. eeeek. Onto my graphics noww: smiles:

blinkies:

other:

blemish on side of head

2008-11-16T17:09:00.000Z

I have a blemish on the side of my head -spazzes- i need it gone now, though it's not that noticeable but haha it's annoying me. I have spreadsheet work to do, hating it right now and I don't even want to open it but I know I'll have to or else I'm dead tommorow eeek. Hmm what else, I bought a new digita camera, woah yes it's casio xD I love it. It's got good quality all I need to know is to learn how to photograph, yeaahhh so I can be cool like all those other photographers. I have a new idol. Jessica jung from SNSD. She's so pretty and I like her <3>_<>_< forget it. I want summer with cold wind. I want to have a good healthy life. I neeed to drink water .... I'm thirsty. Bye for noooww

Good afternoon

2008-11-02T15:20:00.000Z

You're favorite blogger here, Yeap. Sorry I've been off it was holidays and I was too lazy to update. Nothing happened at all, other than I have lots of assignments to do, I haven't done any of them because I can't concertrate at home. So yeah I'll be doing them on Monday in college because I'm a stupid lazy girl. I'm bored a lot nowadays, the interent seems boring to me but I am learning one new thing. Guess what it is? Korean..yeah. 한국 it's so difficult to type it up because I don't have a korean keyboard at all. I kind of know the alphabet, but not all. E.g, I know the n,h,g/k,r. haha lol I'm so hopeless. ewww i ate too much chocolate I think I may puke. >.> Other than that, nothing is new.

Small update today, sorry <3

Hey ya'll

2008-10-10T17:23:00.000+01:00

It's been a week I think. I missed typing up long long words and ranting about life, it sucks. yeah it does. Okay so like remeber I told you about my new skin care routine, guess what. I broke out and had red pimples all over my face, all i did was use the marshmallow cleanser once.
I don't think it might have been the reason, I'm not going to be using the Pore perfecting Deep Clean mousse, because it has hydroxy acid which may increase sun sensetivity. Yup so that's a no no, lucky that was cheap or else, i'd be like waste of money. I'm going to run that down my sink.
Keeping the fask mask, because I used that once and I did see a change, need to use it more often. What else, the marshmallow keeping that because it just might not have been the marshmallows fault. Yeah, my mom balmed it on my bed, said that i hadn't changed my pillow case or my duvet cover, true i haven't done it for a month. Changed the pillow yesterday need the duvet doing now.
I went to town, brought new jeans, wide jeans because my thighs are huge, like woah! got shoes too, because I walk to college and my shoes get ripped, the have holes underneath them already and I only bought them 2 weeks ago, it sucks.
Haha I didn't stop using biore perfect pore exfoliate and scrub, it's just too good! I use the nivea moisturser, but not the eye cream as much.
I put on weight I think eek. I have a new hobby, pen spinning. Yes sounds werid, but google it or youtube it, it's totally awesome. I can't even do a thumbaround yet, but I can do a fingerpass which is okay for a beginner.
I feel like the only girl in the community of upsb, but oh well i'll just pretend I'm a boy, lmafo.
Life is pretty good, kind of yep. Hating the weather makes me hot and itchy, stupid sun and run.
-kills it-
I still haven't bought Suncare cream with SPF 30+, I'm trying to damage myslef, stupid me.
Need to buy that because I don't want wrinkles at 20. I'm not even 18 yet!! Help!!
I ate junk today, have been doing that since a week. I shouldn't be doing it, but I can't resist it.
What else, oh yeah, I started wearing my glasses on today again, I never wear them because I'm lazy. But I did today, I need to take them to college before my eyeight goes worst.
I cut my long nails, for the sake of the pen! I was going to grow them, but oh well they were annoying me, especially when I typed it went tap tap tap.

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=A9uQlzkc6a8&feature=related

Super Junior, been a fan since 2007, but lately haven't been paying them attention at all. That's super junior M, they speak chinese or mandarin, I'm confused...it's the same. Ahh well in super junior M they have Zhoumi and Henry and not all the Super junior boys are in it.

I miss Super Junior, I do especially Donghae. He's my favorite in Super Junior since he is cute! Get out another MV!

Now I will name bands I listen to in Kpop.
-DBSK (kind of obessed with them)
-Super Junior (Missing them)
-Kara (keep track of them sometimes)
-SNSD ( " ")
-WG (when the song comes out, then haha)
-Big Bang (" ")
-Epik High ( Table rocks)
-U-kiss ( the had a good MV)
-FT island (was obessed with them. now *_*)

don't remeber the rest

Haha , I need to stop with my obession with DBSK!

The weather is getting cold and I feel cold right now, brrr.

College is fine, the people in my class are crazy. They all are haha.
Weridos in a good way, yeap but I don't like some people in the class, because pff I just don't.
I hate this annoying kid, bugs me sometimes and I feel like hitting him hard so it hurts. GRR don't make me punch you kid.

Missing My old friends when my last college, miss them so much. They are busy with homework because it's their last year in college and have revising probably to do, so I understand they have problems. I missed them so much, I could cry a river. Do well!! you will all pass, I know it.

It's my first year in a different college, so don't get confused har har. I'm hungry now I want to eat. I probably in a few minutes because I miss food.

I want to buy a new coat and I will in this month in the end.

Well I'm off now, since I don't know what to write.

Back after 4months of no blog!

2008-10-02T20:56:00.000+01:00

O.O woah, long time no typing bloggie. I have not beeen busy, just been very lazy so pardon me muahha. I come back with changes to announce, I quit my last college and dropped out, final result was i failed anyway at economics and business. I did pass one course for english, it's alright because i did only one exam anyway. Haaha, then i set my Maths GCSE and guess what genius? I passed with a C. oh yes baby i did, i'm happy i did and I don't have to do it all over again which would have been pissing for me. I'm now at a different college studying IT. Yes you heard right, IT information technology and this course is perfect for me, it's all coursework based which means no exam. I'm so happy that they have no exams but i know the coursework might be frightening but oh well.
Change to announce, my hair is a retard. I want my friggen fringe to grow because when i tied my hair it's okay, but because i sweep my fringe to the side it looks werid with spikey hair popping out. Need that to grow, like now.
I discovered Biore pore perfect, a product that works well. Damn so well on my skin that my dirt is gone and i look good. Bad thing, I will not buying it again, I do have some spots that don't go away and also because it's chemical based and I'm trying to go natural. Hello Botanics, boots. I'm going to give them a try and see, what's funny. They have a marshmallow cleanser! hahahah marshmallow yup yup weridos. and Rice bran protein mask and well some plant cleanser aswell, or was it a toner. It's a mousse, pore perfecting deep clean. That's what they call it, yes!
I use a very good moisturiser from Nivea, deep clean it has cucumber extracts. I also use their black dark circle removing cream,both are aqua sensations. So yeah, the moisturiser works very well and my skin feels great. It's light i think and it just works so well for my sensetive skin. The dark eye circle cream is great! I have less visibl dark eye circles. I haven't used it for 2 days, but i will go back on track! Use real cucumbers atleast twice a week for better results!! eeekk.
I don't like the Nivea oxygen cleanser gel. Hate it, doesn't actually do it, I'ved used it for a week i think and it hasn't done anything like make my skin more bright or anything. It still looks grey and dull to me. Ekkk. I'm going to finish the product bottle and not buy another one. Waste of money. Guess how much it was for £12.99 , rip off and i hate it. Gah!!
Garnier 3 in 1. is hot!! yeah I like it too. I've used it and I loved it, don't use it anymore. I waste alot of it and it's not cheap. Boots botanic are cheap and natural [supposed to be].

Plans for the future.

-Get french manicure kit, want the white nailpolish.
-Try curling hair and use oil on fridays to mositen the dryness.
-Try out Botanics and hopefully I won't be dissapointed
-Buy asprin and try homemade recipes.
-Use cucumbers on eyes twice a week
-Use lip balm!!!
-Save money
-New shoes, heels so i don't get water in my shoes eeek
-More exercise. sleep before 1am on weekdays

byeeeeeeeeeee for noww. tooodles!

The rant

2008-05-21T11:39:00.000+01:00

I've had my English and Maths exam. The English one went awful, I was sick so I did half of the first paper. I went back on monday to ask the exam office if I could do the 2nd paper. But no i couldn't so I'll be gettting withdrawn from it. The maths exams was easy, I hope I aced it. Because if i did, I'll be so happy. My Business exam is tommorow, for 3hours. I probably won't pass it because I fail in the class. Grade is pretty bad, so yeah. Doesn't give me any hopes at all. I have another Maths exam paper left and also Economics. Agh Exams are so stressing and so ugh. I hate sitting exams, I hating having to get nervous. Strange thing is that it makes me hungry. Haha.

Now to the rant I have. Taesu. Junsu and Taeyoen, or however you spell her name. She is the most favorite member from SNSD. I love her, not in that way though. Haha. Rumour is that she is dating Junsu. Kim Junsu from TVXQ. He was the first member from TVXQ that I liked, he is so cute. Kawaii! I don't know why some fans are getting so worked up about it, it's rumour and may not be true. But if it is True, then get over it. He is a man, she is a woman. They make a cute couple. They seriously do, they look good together. It's about time they got themselves boyfriends or girlfriends because they are 20 and over now, it's about time that they move in the area too. Otherwise they might as well stay single until the fan's accept them to date. It's thier personal life and nobody has a right in it, except for them. So stop gettting all emotional. Junsu will keep singing for TVXQ and Taeyeon for SNSD. It's not like they are running away together to some unknown country.Lol.

2008-04-23T13:44:00.001+01:00

Another rant about Economics and Business today. I hate both of those subject and failing miserably in them. I hate them to such, I'm such a fool for choosing to do those subjects. It's so useless to me. Oh well thankfully I have a back-up plan since I'm going to fail those subjects in the summer. Instead I will go on to do Science and hopefully pass and get great results in those subject. Because I will try hard and I like subjects that don't have exams. I'm doing a coursework based science, so exams I think.
I'm going to try and get my teacher to cancel my two boring subject exams. So I can concentrate on English and my Maths this summer. Hopefully, if I cancel the exams. I can achieve better grades in the exams I'm going to be sitting. That way, I'm not wasting valuable time.
Looked in the mirror and got the scare of my life, pff I'm so ugly it's horrendous and yuck to look at me. Maybe I'm just going over board but still. My face is whack seriously. I never wear make-up because I don't like it and I don't want to. I have patches of dry skin, eww that's just gross. I hate having dry skin. Then I have a few pimples that just grew out of no-where. Techincally , I need a make-over. Which I will get and I will get rid of those ugly dry patches and those blotches on my face. Blemishes I think they're called. Eww I used to have good skin, what happened? Must have been the stress. God, I need to sort out my life. Ah well I'm am doing it anyway.
Omy, I have spelling issues too, I can't spell no more, it's true. I used to be able to spell lots of words but now I can't sometimes even spell "Does" I spell it like "Dose". WTF! I'm hated for reasons like that, so not fair. Ah well I'll get over it eventually. I will eat a dictionary.
I want more manga. I want to buy Korean Yunjae manga. They're so pretty and I like the art.
I want my Manga, I want money.

Tired of my previous life

2008-04-21T18:09:00.000+01:00

Welcome to my Blog, I sound so formal right now it's quiet an embrassment. I am never formal especially on the net. Internet that is, oh well here I go blabbing about my life. Tired. Very tired of it all, I am an addict. A complete internet addict and my addiction is bad, real bad. So I have decided to lower the amount of time I go on. Usually it's about 6 hours and more, but with my exams coming up I want to decrease it to about 2 hours a day. Thats like 4 days in week only.
I know it sounds completely "fake" how the hell would I manage to that. But I'm going to give it a shot. I hope I can do it. Today I got news that I passed in my re-sit maths. Well the first exams I did anyway.
I also did my economics homework for the first time too, well not really the first time. But oh well the teacher was impressed, I want to pass my maths this year and hopefully all my subjects. My exams start like in a month and I'm way stressed, no wonder I'm deciding to put a stop to my addiction. Stupid laptop, computer gives me a headache but I can't help it. Summer is here which means my migranes will be more common and going on the PC/ Laptop will not help me either.
I have goals for this month and summer. Stop my addiction and totally pass with flying colours. Hopefully I will achieve that, I also want to grow tall.
I stumbled upon a meditation of some kind called Qicong I think that's what it's called. I'm deciding to give it a go. Even if it doesn't help me at all, at least I'll be calm and less stress if I don't grow tall. I also spoke to my parents and decided that I needed some medication or some sort to help out my growth spurt. Stupid humans! Why do we have to be short just because our parents are. Blame your parents if your short! That's what I do, gets me no where, they just laugh it off and say eat. I need genes and the HGH.
Sprink break was awesome, I bought a manga book for £7:00 a penny change and it's totally worth it, I only by the manga because of the cute art and story line, I seriously wanted to buy fruit baskets but I decided that it was going to cost too much. Why would I buy like 10 books or more for £7.00 each. Am I insane, if I was rich then I probably would have bought them. But I'm poor, poor as tramp on the street. Well not exactly, but still I'm a teenager who survives on £30 a week. Now that is less, because if you calculate the amount I eat and the other useless things I buy. That is way less.
Manga, on the topic of Manga, I will critise tokyopop. Why? because in every book shop I have been in that sell Manga. I can't seem to find INVU volume 4 and I know it's already out. Do they hate english people, or is it just that the shops stop ordering. I really want to buy it because I'm a fan of the INVU books. I bought the first book, I've read all the three books so far except the 4th one.
My room is small, I need more space to put my college books and paperwork, I live in a dump.
I wish too pass this summer, if I do then I wish that I don't have the same business teacher as in economics. I'm really sick of him, he goes on and on and half the time it's not even on the topic. No wonder I'm failing his class miserably.